i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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