omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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