Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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