just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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