I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
