plz talk dirty to me
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
