Well apparently he's into motor boating.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
