Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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