Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize