so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
