hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
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