who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize