honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
literally had 100 drinks last night.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
