Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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