just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
she peed on how many people?
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize