You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
