Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
