i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
