I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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