I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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