his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
