Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize