and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
