i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
