school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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