Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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