I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
