Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
