That's when you crack a 10am beer
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
