Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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