he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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