just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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