it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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