lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
