He is an equal opportunity slut.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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