Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
i think my cat just said my name.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
