So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Randomize
