I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Randomize
