If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
We got so high we made milksteak
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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