So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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