8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
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