Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
So many bounce houses so little time
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
