i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
