I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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