I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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