he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
