I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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