I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
