Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize