I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
My balls are so social today.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
